Forbidden Chapter Five

"So, can we talk?"

I sat down on his bed, clenching the dark violet sheets. I'm so scared. My palms are sweating, well actually, pretty much everything is sweating. I mean, I'm about to ask him to be my boyfriend without even a clue to whether he likes guys, let alone me.

He sat down next to me, grabbing my hand. It's not a big deal, really, he does it all the time. All the same, I still blushed. I wish even just holding hands meant something to him, but to him it's just a friendly gesture. I guess he assumes that's why I do it, but he's wrong. So wrong.

"Yeah, what's up?" He asked cheerfully.

UGH. I can't do it! "Actually i-it can wait."

He squeezed my hand, then turned to face me. He looked concerned. "Jayy, you wanted to talk, why not just do it now?"

"No, no it's ok. It's not important, really," god I'm such a wuss. I have to do  it but... what if he freaks out? If he doesn't like me, this is going to backfire badly. I don't think he'd ever stop being my friend, but that doesn't mean there won't be a huge awkward tension every time we're together. Then we'll slowly drift apart. I don't want that. Ugghh, what do I do?

"Tell me, pretty please?" Like a child, he stuck out his bottom lip and made his eyes wide, even trying to make himself cry for added effect. "Pretty pretty please Jayy-Jayy, tell me?"

Why are you so cute Dahvie.

"I-I don't know if I should, it's really serious. And it might be a bad idea to ask you."

He seemed to blush at my words, who knows why. His expression went back to normal, and then to a serious one. Still he held onto the light pink that graced his cheeks so perfectly.

"You know you can tell me absolutely anything. Please ask me what you want. Please?" Why does he want me to ask him so badly? Well, I guess honestly anyone would after it's been brought up.

"Fine, but you can't get mad, and you can't stop being my friend, or anything. Promise?"

A look of confusion washed over him, just as his blush grew darker. I wonder what he's thinking. I'm always wondering what he's thinking. We're best friends and all, but I still feel like I know nothing about him. I know a good chunk, but it feels like I've only chipped the tip of the iceberg. I need to know more, maybe I should've thought of that before bringing this up...

"You know I'd never do that, you're my best friend," yeah, just best friends. That's how we should stay. As bad as I want this, I don't know if I can do it.

"I-I can't," I stood up and walked to the desk on the other side of the room that held his laptop, among many other objects. His desk was so cluttered, books, pictures, paper, random figures and toys. Basically not what you'd usually see on a boys desk, there was even a few bottles of hair product and a ton of scattered makeup. Luckily for me I could use this as a distraction from my question.

I heard him sigh before standing and joining me beside the desk. "Hey," I pointed to a picture, trying to avoid the subject. "Who's that in the picture with you?"

He didn't answer. I didn't even need to look at him to know he was glaring at me, arms crossed impatiently. "Tell me. Now."

"Why do you need to know so badly? Trust me, it's nothing," actually it's everything. But you wouldn't even suspect it, would you Dahvie? You never even thought of the possibility, always brushing off any hint I'd drop. I get it's harder for you to pick these things up, but haven't you ever, even for just a second, saw that I like you? No, of course not. Because all you want to be is friends. Why did I even consider doing this?

"Jayy..." I felt his hands grab my own, turning me to face him. What's he doing? "I know it's not nothing. You wouldn't make it such a big deal if it wasn't."

"I'm not making this a big de-" he cut me off.

"Yes, you are. Now tell me, please?"

"Dahvie I just... I'm worried that if I ask you it'll ruin our friendship. I don't want that," I looked up from the floor, trying my hardest not to cry. Wow Jayy, aren't you just the manliest guy ever.

He tilted his head just a bit, "how would it ruin our friendship?" He whispered softly, holding my hands a tiny bit tighter.

I took a deep breath, dropping my voice so quiet, hoping he wouldn't hear. "Because you don't like me back."

I heard a soft gasp, "Jayy..."

There was silence. I feel like such an idiot. Why did I tell him? He knows now. He's going to leave me. He's-

Once again, I was cut off. This time, not by his words, but by his lips. He pulled my arms forward to wrap around his waist, then brought his own up around my neck. His lips worked with mine, making me instantly melt. They're so perfect. He's so perfect. He pulled back and rested his forehead on mine.

"And what if I do like you back?" He spoke sweetly and hushed, almost sounding breathless. I simply smiled and kissed him again, staying there for probably only ten seconds, but it felt like ten minutes.

We stood there silently, grinning with joy. He likes me! He actually does... All that worrying just seems silly now. I can't believe he actually likes me!

"So," he began, pulling away with a happy expression that made me get butterflies. "What were you going to ask me?"

I bit my lip, I almost forgot. But now I have more confidence with this question, it's no longer a complete shot in the dark.

"I was going to ask, if you, I don't know, would maybe want to be with me? ...Together? ...As my boyfriend?" I studied his face for a reaction, anything. My heart is pounding, it wouldn't surprise me if it suddenly exploded or even jumped out of my chest.

Suddenly he jumped up and down excitedly before wrapped his arms around me once again. "Yes! Of course!"

He said yes! Yes yes yes yes! The nervous tears from before became taken over by happy ones. He was still jumping a little in place, he was actually happy I asked him. This is better than I could have hoped for. He's acting like I just asked him to marry me,  it was so adorable. And now this adorable guy is mine.